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| Gourmet table back in 2022 |
Long time readers will know that my wife and I are part of a gourmet group. We were invited into it many years ago and have enjoyed being in it all these years. It consisted of four other couples besides ourselves, and we rotated through our ranks being hosts. We break out the fine china and have a five course meal with each couple being responsible for one of those courses at the direction of the host who usually picks the theme, if any. The results are about five times a year we gather over a delicious meal that stretches over three hours long filled with great conversation among the lawyers, doctors and engineers (me being the only one of the latter) that comprise our group. It has been thoroughly enjoyable.
A few months ago, one of those couples moved away to be nearer their kids and grandkids leaving a hole. Before they left, we had one more gourmet meal and had a great time except at the end when we normally pull out our phones and set up a date for the next couple to host, nothing was brought up. My wife and I, the "newbies" and youngest members of the group just assumed that it had died a natural death as all of the other three remaining couples are getting on in years and probably not physically wanting to continue it anymore. In fact, one of the couples had already stopped hosting it a year before due to infirmities meaning it was now just down to three couples. It is a lot of work to get a house cleaned up for a formal dinner, prepare all the food in a gourmet fashion and then clean up all those dishes afterward. We were sad but understanding.
Then we got a call from the next couple to host it (we go alphabetical by last name) asking us what dates work for us and another one was arranged. Last night as I write this, that meal occurred and as always, it was full of great food and conversation though there were only eight of us instead of the normal ten. Another difference since there were only four couples, we had only four courses instead of the usual five, choosing to drop the salad course and only have appetizers, soup, entree and dessert. Unsure in our minds was what was going to happen at the end since the next time would be our time to host.
Finally, one of the couples brought it up for discussion at the end as we were preparing to leave. One person perhaps said it the best when he said, "at this point it is more about the conversation and friendship than the food," and I don't think it could be said any better. We all agreed to continue the tradition but to not continue it in a formal tradition. Four (or even five) courses are no longer required, nor the use of formal dinnerware or even our method of serving the courses which tradition holds that the couple responsible for that course, prepare it and bring it back to the table while the other couples continue the stimulating conversation. We even allowed that we could just serve food "family" style. One person even brought up that perhaps we could go so far as to have a beer and pizza night and everyone eagerly agreed. The couple who had stopped hosting due to infirmities even said they would be interested in hosting again under such rules meaning we now can rotate among four homes again.
It all sounds great and it opens up a lot of possibilities for the future but mama didn't raise no fool. I know I'll be scrubbing the kitchen and the floors in the week before to make sure everything it spotless to my boss's eye, but I do think it will relieve a lot of pressure on the hosting aspect, especially the setup and cleanup that occur as bookends to the meal. No longer will I have to pull out the fine china from the various places and get it polished up and put in place or spend the hours and sinks full of dishes afterwards since it can't be run through the dishwasher. We will carry it on for a while longer yet though with the age of our members, I'm guessing the remaining years can sadly be counted on one hand at best.
For now anyway, we are relaxing a bit until sometime closer to the middle of May when we have chosen to meet again at our home and beforehand, I will be scrubbing the floors and the corners of the kitchen in preparation. I just may get out of polishing the fine china ahead of time and allow the dishwasher to do the bulk of the cleanup work afterwards. Maybe.
In case you are curious, last night's menu:
Appetizers: Cheese and crackers, fruit and goat cheese on a crostini and a shrimp and vegetable cocktail in a cup.
Soup: Aged cheddar soup with creme fresh, chives and pine nuts served with freshly baked sourdough bread. (Our contributed course.)
Entree: Baked cod with vegetable packets, garden peas with almonds and a mushroom risotto.
Dessert: Coffee and rum infused chocolate mouse on meringue wafer with chocolate curls on top.
I love the thought of getting together with friends like that, but not the formal part. I like the idea of a more relaxed atmosphere without pretenses. Have fun cleaning this week!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the formal part for many years. It was a good excuse to pull out all the stops in our ever increasingly casual world. But as time wore on, it became more of a burden than excitement. I'm a procrastinator and a realist. Since our turn isn't until May, and any cleaning done next week will quickly be undone, I'll just wait until the first part of May to start doing the "deep clean."
DeleteSue and daughter were talking about our good china. We don't use it because it is good, and we don’t care about formality. Daughter doesn’t really care about it when we pass on. Times have changed. Most of us no longer care for formality. So, your new plan sounds like a good step for the future, just as the more formal way served you well in the past.
ReplyDeleteWhen we were invited into the group, we had to go purchase fine china as it wasn't something given to our generation like past generations. I hope we still use it but just at smaller gatherings so there aren't so many dishes to do afterwards.
DeleteEd, that sounds like a natural transition. Formal dinners can be a lot of work (I say that not having actually put any together).
ReplyDeleteThat coffee sounds amazing!
The dessert, as were all the courses, really good. Because of the formal nature of it, everyone always strove to present their best cooking. I know we have had test runs of our course before actually making the dish on the afternoon of the event.
DeleteBeer & Pizza seem to be a good change of pace, how about Wine & Chocolate night?
ReplyDeleteI'm sure there might be a few votes for that option.
DeleteYou haven't talked about this in a long time, so I wasn't sure if you were still doing it. Didn't y'all have to suspend things during Covid? I'm sure the formal aspect was fun (for some.... not really for me), but I think it's great that you're willing to make it easier so the fellowship can continue.
ReplyDeleteAlthough we maybe held off for the first few months at the initial onset of Covid, we did hold it during the latter parts of that pandemic after everyone was vaccinated. I think I was the last one in the group to get vaccinated since I wasn't a front line person nor had comorbidities, namely the age that everyone else in our group has.
DeleteI am not sure I have ever been to such a formal dinner, the table looks lovely...so perfect! We have a couple that we get together with used to be once a month, it is less now since we are gone for the winter...sometimes we go "out" for our turn...sometimes it is a hotdish plunked on the table...the conversation is really what it is all about. Plus they have a dog:)
ReplyDeleteThe table above was probably the most simple one. Most of the other hosts have been doing this for decades and have lots of things like cast pewter themed napkin rings, candle holders, etc. Their tables can be very elaborate. Since we didn't have any of those things, and the lanterns you see were some I picked up for less than $20, I think they gave us some grace on our table setting as long as we had our fine china and silverware out.
DeleteIt feels a little weird to let go of traditions, but this sounds like a reasonable and workable compromise. Still the food and companionship--without all the work and preparation. Whatever works!
ReplyDeleteIt had a great run and I think if everyone was 20 years younger, it would still be going strong. I think the tradition of getting five peers together along with their spouses for an evening of food and fellowship, it probably the secret for the longevity and the reason it will continue awhile longer without the formal setting.
DeleteWhat a beautiful table! Neat tradition but not my cup of tea - as I only drink green tea and eat a lot of rice. However, it shows such high class like in those old movies. Except in those old movies, they had servants to cook, serve, and clean up. You will now have the best of both worlds. Good friends in a more relaxed setting. Congrats!
ReplyDeleteI've never cared for tea much but I have grown quite fond of rice thanks to the in-law Filipino side of my family.
DeleteAll good things must come to an end.
ReplyDeleteOr at least adapt to the times.
DeleteDan and I have been re-watching Downton Abbey, where every dinner is a formal one. Of course, other people do all the work, but even so, I would find the conversation to be pretty exhausting. That said, having company for a meal is always a lot of work!
ReplyDeleteI think it would be fun to do different cultural cuisines. I've been doing that (on a very small scale), working my way back through the people groups of my family tree. I'm aiming for an end-of-year blog series similar to the one I did last year, featuring Christmas music. Foods and dishes for each group is a lot of research and, of course, the cooking. But it's been really interesting so far.
We've done a lot of ethnic themed meals over the years including Filipino, British, German, Greek, etc. The other four couples however usually went for seasonal themes or just a normal meat, starch and vegetable kind of meal.
DeleteIt's great that your group has been able to adapt to better meet the needs of its members. I like the fact that it's become more about the people involved than the food. Sometimes it's fun to haul out the fancy china, but it can indeed be a lot of work! (As my mom aged, she began putting pretty much everything in the dishwasher. She just didn't care anymore.)
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, we made the mistake of choosing China with a metal band embedded on the rim and it arrived full of warning stickers about not putting it into dishwashers under high heat. Had I known that ahead of time, we may have opted for something more dishwasher friendly.
DeleteI am looking forward to hearing about the next gathering in May, Ed. And, despite the more relaxed experience, if we were participating I would be right there with you scrubbing those floors and making sure everything looked awesome.
ReplyDeleteOur hallway bathroom never sparkles as brightly as the day of our hosting the gourmet club. If you come for a visit and need to visit the facilities, I recommend the day after we host gourmet.
DeleteI'm glad your dinner tradition is continuing even if in a less formal manner. -Jeff (https://fromarockyhillside.com)
ReplyDeleteI was okay with it not going on though I would have missed the conversations we have so it was a pleasant surprise to know it will continue.
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