After closing on our new home, a process that was plenty painful, I shouldn't have tempted fate by thinking that the worst was over. Shortly after we were finally moved in, we were told by our mortgage broker that the closing on our old home may take a week or two longer than planned. That was the last time we talked with her for the next month and a half.
What we did hear during that time was from the real estate agent we used to sell our house who kept forwarding us long email strings involving many other people. Near as I can piece together, the buyer of our old house sold a muscle car for a down payment but after the loan was in progress, it was discovered that technically the car was his father's car and though it had been given to him as a gift, there wasn't any documentation. Loan one fell through and we signed our second contract extension.
A second loan was started but something happened there. Either the now upset buyer was riding the loan broker too hard or that loan broker screwed up on the loan but it too fell through and this time, the whole thing was given to another loan broker, the same one who screwed up the loan on our new house three weeks earlier. After a week of silence, we signed a third extension to our contract.
The third loan was in progress but all we heard (forwarded in emails from our real estate agent) was that the bank or underwriters were waiting on this documentation or another. The fourth extension was signed. Now just a week shy of two months after we were told it might take a week or two longer, our real estate agent called to say that the closing day was set for the following Monday. We showed up and I nearly bit my tongue in half when the loan broker opened up the conversation by laughing and asking if we thought we would finally get this thing closed.
All through this ordeal my wife and I were basically unemployed for almost a month and making payments on two mortgages plus all the associated costs of moving and repairing of our new home. Had I not been a real conservative fellow, I could have been in real hot water by the time my wife gets her first paycheck in a couple weeks. Also, during the market disaster of 2008-2010, instead of investing in declining or stagnant stock market, I paid down our loan quite a bit. As a result, despite only owning that home for eight years, I had a huge amount of equity in the place. Equity that I only received yesterday in the form of a check. I hope this does it for me dealing with mortgages and loan brokers for the time being. If it isn't, I am certainly not going through that bank anymore.