Tree with Perfect Pitch - Arie den Boer Aboreteum
I consider myself a pretty healthy person. I don't eat a red meat with every meal or even every day. I eat my share of fruits and vegetables though not probably what they (the government) recommends but really, who trusts the government. But when my mom had a heart attack last summer, I thought I probably should at least get a physical to see how things are doing. I probably haven't had a physical since my high school sports days so I thought I was probably due. I am past my mid 30's edging closer to 40 when all sorts of things are supposed to be scheduled on a regular basis. So over my end of the year vacation time, I bit the bullet and made an appointment.
I gave blood, I gave urine but fortunately avoided any rubber gloved or sanitized cameras going into normally outgoing opening tests that I thought were probably imminent. I found out that my cholesterol is normal (that was my main concern), my blood is normal, my liver is strong as an ox (I didn't destroy too much in college in other words), and I'm pretty much considered healthy. Despite my better judgment, I did bring up the subject of a colonoscopy and the doctor said not to worry until I was 40 but just to be safe, gave me a "crap card." Pardon my pun and French, no shit, that is what he called it. I am supposed to smear some of it onto the card three different days and drop it off for analysis and supposedly, that will catch anything long before there are any major problems.
Then the doctor told me of a anecdotal story of a guy who received the crap card and returned them as promised with the little sanitary flap folded in place. However, he said the flap was bulged well out of place as if it was covering a good-sized portion of… ahem… substance to be analyzed. The nurse asked the doctor if he wanted to open it and the doctor politely declined. Moral of the story is that you don't need much smeared on the card for analysis. I'm glad he told me the story so that I won't make the same mistake.